Is Your Child Up to “Know Good”?
“There are no ‘good’ or ‘bad’ people. Some are a little better or a little worse, but all are activated more by misunderstanding than malice”-Tennessee Williams
Most of us like to compartmentalize our lives. We want to put different areas of our lives in neat little “boxes” that are free of conflict and adversity. When random unexplainable events disrupt our lives, we search aimlessly for answers that make sense to us.
Children are polarized thinkers. They see things as good or bad. This is why cartoons, movies and books always have a good person and a villain. As they grow older and experience life, they start to notice the area of “gray areas of life” and start to question the concept of good vs. evil, right vs. wrong.
Unfortunately, what is happening in our society is that adults are now becoming polarized thinkers. We are so quick to judge and react to situations and simplify them as good or bad. We focus on the bad things that we tend to overlook the good in the world. Our energy is directed at the violence, hate and anger that is permeating our society. Some of us are pessimistic; eagerly waiting to share bad news on social media. Instead of enjoying the good times, we wait anxiously for something bad to happen.
We’ve lost faith in ourselves and in future generations. We want to be optimistic about the future, but once we hear about another random act of violence, it sends us driving down despondency road again.
What are we teaching our children through our words and actions? How can we tell them to think positive, to plan for the future, when we present such a bleak future? Why do we tell our kids that “It gets better” then we turn around and say “Things are getting worse”.
We shouldn’t be surprised that our kids are becoming desensitized to tragedy. If we don’t help our children to appreciate the good in life, we will raise a generation of jaded and cynical men and women.
We inundate ourselves with bad news and we partake in negativity by watching reality shows that glorify bullying, and thoughtlessness. Think about how much negativity and bad news we share through social media. Our kids are watching and paying attention and they’re beginning to accept this as normal. We can’t create a perfect world for our kids but we can change how they perceive life and tragedies.
We have to remind our kids that life has good and bad moments. They need reassurance that all is not lost and that there are good people in the world. If we want to raise loving and empathetic adults, we need to exemplify love, empathy and compassion. It starts with reminding ourselves that there is good left in the world, but it’s our job to notice it and show it to our kids.