Have Faith in Dad

This week, I am dedicating a post a day to a word the exemplifies a “real dad”.  Unfortunately, our society had taken a polarized stand when it comes to fatherhood. Basically, you’re either Cliff Huxtable or Darth Vader.

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We tend to neglect or forget the men in between. The dads who despite not having a great role model, dis their best to provide for their children, love them and instill strong family values. These men are rarely talked about because we have this unfair expectations of fathers. We laud fathers who make supreme sacrifices but we demonize those who fall short of being “Dad of the Year”.

We forget that these men are human  and not without fault. Yes, its not enough for them to provide for their children, they must be emotionally, mentally and spiritually present in their lives. Before a man can do all this, he must have faith in himself as a father. He has to believe that he is the man for this job. He has to know that parenting is a futile attempt to make order out of chaos.

Yes, there will be days when you disappoint your kids and yourself, yet this does not mean that you are a bad father.  It is a learning experience.  Just as there are no perfect moms, there are no perfect dads.

So today, I urge all fathers who feel they are threading closely to parenting failure to take heart. For every dad that thinks he’s screwing up, there’s a kid proving him wrong.

Moms, let’s do our part to be supportive and encouraging instead of critical when dad is doing his best. We can not control and dictate every situation.  If we want our sons to become responsible fathers, we have to let them see their dad in action.

I used to think that I did things better than my husband and would micromanage almost everything.  Looking back, I was afraid that if he could handle it,  he would take over my role as mom.  It sounds silly now, but the insecurities we have as parents manifest in our actions.

Learning to share the responsibilities gave me more freedom to do the things I wanted to do and gave my husband a chance to bond with his sons.

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